


I Never Wanted Anything From You (except everything you had)

by ambiguously



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anakin Skywalker Leaves the Jedi Order, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-01-06 02:26:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18379058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ambiguously/pseuds/ambiguously
Summary: Ahsoka leaves the Jedi Order, and Anakin follows.





	I Never Wanted Anything From You (except everything you had)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lastwingedthing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastwingedthing/gifts).



"The Jedi Order is your life. You can't just throw it away like this. Ahsoka, you are making a mistake."

His own words echoed back in his ears, taunting him. Of course he'd understood the desire to walk away from this, all of this. Of course he understood why she'd made the choice. And of course, she'd already known he would. They were too much alike, another reason the Council had distrusted her too quickly. Had Obi-Wan kept her as his own Padawan and Anakin the ever-present helper instead, his influence might have been enough to nudge her onto a less fraught path. Destiny had made other plans for them all.

As if summoning him, Obi-Wan came to the doorway of Anakin's room. "Do you want to talk?"

Anakin's eyes focused. He'd been tinkering with another device, hands moving on autopilot as his heart fell heavy with loss. They'd been building this together as a project. "Will talking change anything? All of you turned on her. You would have seen her executed for a crime she didn't commit. Of course she didn't come back."

Obi-Wan stepped in uninvited. He sat next to Anakin. "I suppose it looks that way, from your point of view."

A lot of things looked clear from Anakin's point of view as he stared at the device in his hands. He'd told her not to throw away her life here. He'd told her leaving the Order was a mistake. He'd said the same things to her that he'd repeated to himself every time he returned to the Temple instead of staying with Padmé forever.

All of this on his mind, and perhaps more of it than he intended written on his face, he looked at his former master, his oldest friend here. "You think she was right to leave?"

Obi-Wan looked at the thing in Anakin's hands. "Anakin, since the day I met that girl, I only wanted the best for her. I assumed at the time that meant guiding her to become the finest Jedi she could, whether as my student or as yours. Over the past few years, what I came to understand was that I want Ahsoka to become the finest person she can be, whether as a Jedi, or as something she has yet to discover for herself. And I want her to be happy."

Bitterness came to his mouth first. "You think I don't want her to be happy?"

"I think you'd prefer she be happy here with you."

"She should be happy here. This is her home."

"That's the last, hardest piece to learn. We want our Padawans to follow in the same life we chose. The final test for a master is to allow this young person one has taught and cared for so long to choose the life that's right for them, even if it's not the life one would have chosen."

Anakin set the device on the table. "I can let her go," he said. "If that's what will make her happy." He watched Obi-Wan stand. "Does that mean I pass my final test?"

Obi-Wan's mouth twitched in amusement as he went back towards the door. "Sorry, were we talking about you?"

"You said …."

"I said I want my Padawan to be the best person he can be, no matter where his destiny takes him, and that I want him to be happy." He took a look around Anakin's small, cluttered room, pausing for a moment at a spot beside his bed. He looked as though he would say more. Instead, he left with the door open behind him.

Anakin followed where Obi-Wan's eyes had gone. Most of the things in his room weren't his possessions. They were projects, ideas, prototypes for engine designs or new lightsabers. One of the few things that was his own sat beside his bed. It was a picture of his mom, which Padmé had requested from that man Lars before they'd left Tatooine. She'd saved it, giving it to Anakin a few months later when it wouldn't ignite his grief again, only bring him comfort. He'd been touched by the thought, and it was one of the few things she'd ever given him that he could display freely. He'd set Ahsoka's beads down beside the picture without even thinking.

Home and happiness weren't places. They were the people he loved.

Three hours later, Anakin pressed the chime at Padmé's door. He hadn't contacted her, not since Ahsoka had walked out. He had a lot to catch her up on.

She answered the door. She saw his traveling robes, and the very small case in his hand that held almost everything that he owned. "Ani?"

"I told them. I told them everything. I left the Order." The words flew out in a jumble, rather than with the measured certainty he'd practiced along his walk here. "They offered Ahsoka her place back, and she said no. She walked out. I don't know where she is. And I couldn't stay. Not any more."

Padmé stepped aside, giving him room to come inside. He entered, a shiver moving through him as he crossed the threshold. Every time he'd come here before, it had been carrying the weight of their secret. No more secrets now. He walked into her rooms as her husband.

As soon as the door was closed, Padmé set aside his bag and drew him into a hug. "I wish you'd told me you were going to tell them. I'll need to prepare a statement. We'll be lucky if there aren't reporters here by morning." He felt no anger in her. "I'm glad, Ani. I didn't want to keep it a secret forever."

She drew back, taking his hand. He was surprised but pleased when she pulled him towards her bedroom. He'd assumed they'd spend a little more time tonight talking things over, but then, they'd both developed the habit of dealing with their problems with sex first and words after in the dark. The madcap rush of their secret along with the constant danger of the war had always given them the need to reassure themselves they were both alive before they sorted out what to do next.

The war was over for him. Jedi were generals, but Anakin Skywalker was only another man now, no longer part of the GAR. Pieces of the life he'd chosen to walk away from revealed themselves bit by bit in his mind, and he told himself this was for the best. This was the life he wanted.

A small light had been left on in her room. Padmé paused in the doorway and tilted her head for Anakin to look.

Ahsoka was restless even in her dreams, twitching against the pillow in some agitated dream.

"She fell asleep about half an hour ago," Padmé said. "I tried contacting you at the Temple, but there was no answer."

"She came here?"

"Of course." Padmé led him back to the veranda, sitting next to him on her lush sofa as she engaged the privacy field, shielding them from prying eyes looking in. "Where else did she have to go?"

"I was afraid she'd already hopped a ship back to Shili."

"She thought about it. But that's not her home." Home was the people you cared about. Ahsoka had come to the same door Anakin had. They really were too much alike. Padmé yawned. "We can all talk things through in the morning. I have a long day ahead tomorrow, and I need sleep." She pulled her feet up beneath her, reclining comfortably against him. Typically they only slept out here by accident, too tired to crawl the short distance to bed.

Anakin pushed his luck. "You know, this is my first night not as a Jedi." Padmé made a noise in her throat that might have been a sleepy chuckle. "What?"

"That's the second time tonight I've heard that as a pick-up line." Her breathing evened out. Anakin half sat, half sprawled beside her, brain suddenly wide awake.

* * *

Morning arrived with a jostle as Padmé moved him aside. Anakin twisted to lie in the spot she'd vacated, a smile growing as she moved away to make herself some caf. They hadn't spent many mornings together. Even when they'd been able to steal time for each other, he often had to slip away to be back home before dawn. That had all changed.

He had expected more panic to set in as he fully accepted what he'd done. He'd walked away from everything. He'd abandoned the life he had been set up to lead since he was nine years old. He knew that things didn't end neatly, that there would be questions, arguments, even a scandal. This wasn't over. But as he watched Padmé, a simple peace replaced the worry, along with the surety that this was where he was meant to be.

Movement caught his eye, and he sat up as Ahsoka emerged from the bedroom. He didn't miss the openly pleased look on her face as she saw Padmé. He also didn't miss how her face snapped shut when she saw him on the sofa.

"Good morning," he said first, with a false cheerfulness.

She looked back at Padmé, betrayed. "You told him I was here."

"I didn't. He showed up on his own, just like you did." She took a long drink of her caf. "I need to get ready. You both know where the food is." She finished her drink quickly, then moved past them to the 'fresher. For half a moment, Anakin considered following her. Showering together was another rare luxury.

Ahsoka stayed at the door, watching him. "You followed me here?"

"I had no idea you were here. Lucky coincidence."

She folded her arms. "Uh huh."

Anakin raised his hands in innocence. "Believe me or don't. I thought about what you said, and I thought about a lot of other things, and I told the Council I quit too."

Ahsoka reached for the wall. "You did what?"

"I left the Order. I considered telling them I was leaving in protest for how you were treated, but the truth is, this is a choice I've been struggling with for a long time. You were the last pebble on the balance tray. I did intend to discover where you'd gone." He took a breath. Truth was hard, and harder still for having been covered over for so long. "I did not expect to find you here with my wife."

He watched for her reaction. He expected surprise. He wasn't sure how to read what else he saw. "That explains a lot."

"I wondered if you'd figured it out. I'm sure Obi-Wan did, though he's never said."

"I didn't think you were married. I knew you were having a romance." Finally she stepped towards him, walking closer to sit on the other end of the sofa. "How long?"

"Almost three years. Right after the Battle of Geonosis."

She turned away, assimilating this. "You've been married to Padmé this whole time?"

"It was either keep the secret or be removed from the Order. Until yesterday, I couldn't think about walking away. Even now, part of me is telling myself I'm being selfish, that the war needs me, that this is a mistake."

"I know what you mean."

"You can still go back," he told her. At her sudden jump, he reached out between them, placing a hand on her arm. "Not that I think you should. You have that option. I don't. I told them about Padmé. Even if I went back today and said I changed my mind, they wouldn't accept me. Not without divorcing her and renouncing everything, and even then they couldn't trust that I was telling the truth."

"I'm not going back. I'm not a Jedi any more. I don't know who I am." She shifted closer, and Anakin put his arm around her.

"That makes two of us."

The 'fresher door opened, and Padmé emerged in a warm mist wearing only a towel. "You two have sorted things out?"

"Sure," said Anakin. "You've got two homeless ex-Jedi in your apartment. Now what?"

Padmé nodded towards the bedroom. "Now you can both join me in here and help me pick out my clothes for today. I need an outfit that says, 'Yes, you just found out I have a secret husband but let's focus on this treaty.'"

Ahsoka stood, and Anakin followed both women back to Padmé's dressing area. Ahsoka said, "Your clothes are more talkative than I would have expected."

"You'd be surprised." She kept the towel on. Anakin was mildly disappointed and wished Padmé hadn't invited Ahsoka back here as they poked through her gowns. He wasn't sure how to read the occasional glance on Ahsoka's face. He dismissed the thought that she shared his disappointment, but Padmé's words from last night came back to him. And she'd come here first.

Padmé settled on a dress that she told them said, "austere yet warm," and asked for help in pulling her hair back into a more simple braid than her usual.

"It's a typical hairstyle for married women," she said, pushing the pins into place to hold the look. "I've been avoiding it for obvious reasons. If my image is sent back to Naboo, they'll understand."

Anakin was confused as ever at the symbolism Padmé swore was in every aspect of her dress and manner. He asked Ahsoka, "Did you get all that from her hairdo?"

"Don't ask me. I don't have hair."

Padmé glanced at her fondly. "One of the many things I like about you. With most people I know, I need to read every clue of every strand of hair, every fold of cloth. You would be amazed at the times Chancellor Palpatine has been offering deadly insults to his political rivals just by the roll of his sleeves." Padmé affixed a small clasp in her braid, still watching Ahsoka in the mirror. "Whereas you are always one hundred percent yourself, no deceit, no artifice, no calling Senator Taa a whoreson by the tilt of your shoe."

Anakin looked down at his boots. "Snips, we have to get better clothes. We're missing out."

"You're not," Padmé said. "You're both wonderfully honest." Her gaze switched to Anakin. "Starting now, anyway."

He reached out and took her hand. "I'm sorry for making this hard for you."

"It's not hard. It's what we should have done a long time ago."

* * *

The news was brutal. Ahsoka and Anakin watched together as reporters spent most of the day shouting at Padmé whenever she appeared from the Senate chambers. The Order refused to say a word, although one of them had to have told someone. One intrepid reporter had managed to get in touch with Rex all the way out on his mission and, shoving a holocam in his face, asked him about the salacious rumor that General Skywalker had a secret wife. Rex sputtered in confusion as Artoo beeped irritably behind him.

"He's going to be so mad," Anakin said.

"You think? Rex adores you, and he just found out you've been lying to him."

He muted the feed and looked at her. "How angry are you?"

Ahsoka folded her arms and crossed her legs, crouching in on herself. "I don't have space in my head to be angry with you right now. Give me a few days."

"Would it help to say I'm sorry?"

"No, because you're not. You and Padmé made the choice to lie to everyone, and I know it was for a good reason, but you aren't sorry you did it, you're only sorry you had to."

He examined her words for a place to disagree, but she wasn't wrong. "I wish things could have been different. I wish that wasn't a choice we had to make. I wanted to tell you. I wanted to tell everyone."

"Well, now everyone knows. What are you going to do?"

"Live. Somewhere. Here, I guess. Padmé's work centers on Coruscant. I can accompany her on missions like before. I can still act as her bodyguard."

"It's good to have things to do." She was still withdrawn. Her name had come up on the news feeds, even exonerated from the murders, 'whereabouts unknown.' She looked away from the hologram out into the city, the privacy field barely a glitter in the sunlight streaming down. She'd come here with nowhere else to go.

"You know you can stay with us for as long as you want, right?"

"I know." Still looking out, her face broke into a smile. Padmé's ship was approaching the balcony. A familiar warmth filled him as she disembarked. The field parted to allow her entrance. From outside, no one could see as Anakin reached her first and hugged her.

"Welcome home. How bad was it? We were watching the news."

The smile she gave him was pained. "It wasn't as bad as I'd feared. I received congratulations from many of my colleagues. Apparently they weren't surprised." Her mouth turned. "The Chancellor wasn't surprised at all, though he acted like he was. He suggested we take a proper honeymoon back on Naboo. He even offered the use of his own estate if we wanted privacy."

"That's very kind of him," Anakin said, but he saw the discomfort on her face. "What?"

"I had the strangest feeling he was disappointed to find out the truth, even though I'd swear he already knew. And he was insistent that you and I travel to Naboo for a holiday together." She shook her head. "It sounds silly."

"He's just happy for us. The Chancellor never married. He's probably feeling wistful that his protégée has done something with her life that he never managed."

"Maybe. I told him no. I already have accepted a Senate mission to the Albarrio sector. I'd like you both to accompany me."

"That'll be great," he said. "It'll get us out of here for a while, let things die down. And you'll have the two best bodyguards possible at your side." He looked at Ahsoka encouragingly. "And it's something useful to do."

Ahsoka shook her head. "Thank you for the offer, but I shouldn't. I need to think about where my life is headed. Joining you on another Senate mission isn't moving forward. Besides," she said with a smile and a sigh, "you two should spend some time alone together now that you finally can."

"If you're sure," Padmé said. "You can stay here while we're gone of course."

"I really should go. Thanks for letting me spend the night." She gave Padmé a quick hug, but Padmé held her longer when she went to let go.

"I mean it, Ahsoka. You will always have a place with us. You don't even have to ask. You're my friend, and I care about you."

Anakin couldn't see her face, but he felt the tight twist of her emotions as she relaxed into the hug. "Thanks."

He wrapped his arms around her from the other side, embracing them both. Everyone else had turned on her. Everyone else had abandoned her. She was walking away before her last few friends hurt her. "Come back when you're ready."

"I will."

* * *

Scipio was horrible, and they almost died. Typical mission for the most part, except that he didn't have to pretend not to prioritize Padmé's safety, or to hide his relief and joy when she was safe. They returned to Coruscant and for once, Anakin didn't have to march back to the Temple to report. This strange new life appealed to him more every day.

Ahsoka left them a message. She'd found a place to stay, and she'd like to be contacted when Rex returned from his own mission. She was still on Coruscant.

"I'm sure she's fine," Anakin said when he saw Padmé's worried expression at the recording.

"How can you be sure?"

"She's got a good head on her shoulders. She'll call if she gets into trouble."

"No, she'll assume she can get herself out of trouble because someone taught her cocky overconfidence instead of prudence. She's exactly like you."

"Then she'll definitely be fine." But now he was worried, too.

* * *

Rex's ship arrived one standard week later. Anakin took the excuse to contact Ahsoka. They could go together to talk with him, explain everything. He'd be far too concerned over Ahsoka's wellbeing to spend much time griping about Anakin. He might even come to understand better than most. They'd spent a lot of time together, talking about everything, or almost everything. A boy who'd been a slave from birth was well situated to understand a man who'd been born to serve, and they'd both called the same people "Master."

Ahsoka didn't answer the summons. Two days passed, then three.

"We have to find her," Padmé said, and Anakin didn't argue. He'd already traced the beacon from her last message, as unhelpful as that had been.

"She's deep in the underlevels. The distance isn't far from our location, but the depth is more than I've ever been."

Padmé looked over his shoulder, pulling up the available maps, but most ended well above her position. "Here. This one has that level partially charted." She zoomed in the hologram, though the lack of detail didn't help. "What is she doing down there?"

"I'm going to find out." The worry had turned into a full-blown companion, nagging him constantly. She couldn't be dead. He was sure he'd feel it in the Force if Ahsoka was killed.

Padmé made a noise in her throat and vanished into her dressing area. In far less time than Anakin would have expected, she emerged in a simple traveling tunic and pants, her hands already tying her hair into a neat bun. "We're going to find out, you mean."

Worry took a different form. "It's going to be dangerous." This earned him a glare, and a reminder of a recent argument. He almost met her in the challenge, and made himself back down. "So bring a good blaster. Please?"

Padmé smiled at him, and went to fetch her holster.

* * *

Coruscant was built atop itself, thousands upon thousands of years of construction, habitation, and obliteration by enemies and time. Archaeologists came down here to explore the origins of human civilization, or so Padmé told him as they made their precarious way through this abandoned part of the sub-city.

Ahsoka wasn't at her last location, which didn't surprise him. Padmé broadcast their signal to her at regular intervals as they searched, but she didn't reply. Surrounding them, he felt an eerie, dark presence. Voices at the edge of hearing, at the edge of thought, hushed by him like wind soughing through the long-forgotten tunnels and half-collapsed chambers of this place. 

"There's something sinister here," Anakin said. They'd stopped to rest and Padmé took the break to carefully draw out where they'd been to narrow down where they should look. "The more we go in this direction, the more I feel the presence of the Dark Side."

Padmé looked down the shadowed corridor before them. "Do you think that's where Ahsoka went?"

"Maybe. I don't know why she would."

"She found a mystery, and it echoed with the Force. She got curious and went exploring."

"She should have called for help and waited for backup." Padmé's smirk annoyed him. "What?"

"You never listen to yourself, do you?" She stood and offered him a hand up. "Come on."

"We don't know she's there."

Padmé sighed. "Anakin, if you were on your own and found a place like this, that's exactly where you'd be, no calling for help, no waiting for backup. You'd rush right in and get into trouble. Ahsoka's there."

"I was not that bad of a teacher," he grumbled at her as they walked.

"Some things you can't teach. She's always been as headstrong and reckless as you. May the Force help me, it's one of the things I love about you both." The way she said it stirred something inside him, although he didn't know the words he wanted to say. Before he could try, she said, "We've got to be getting close. Can you use the Force to sense where she is?"

"It's not a directsat."

"I know, but can't you reach out and find her?"

Anakin gave her an exasperated look. "I've been reaching. I think she's alive. That doesn't tell me where." He knew where, though. Padmé was right. Ahsoka would have been drawn to the dark place, if only out of curiosity. She would be in that direction.

They walked in silence for a while, listening to the cold whisper of air around them. The darkness grew as they moved, and part of Anakin yearned to run towards it, like a moth struggling to beat itself against a glowpanel. The rest of him feared what they would find. A Jedi did not allow fear to rule him, but Anakin was no longer a Jedi. He feared for Ahsoka's life. He feared for Padmé's safety. He feared the future that was blocked to his forevision, as so much had been blocked to the Jedi in recent years. Was this darkness the embodiment of what they struggled against? Could the two of them hope to fight it?

"She's here," Padmé said, startling him, and dashed ahead into a dark corridor veering away from their path.

Anakin hurried behind her. "Wait!"

She ignored him, and to his surprise and maybe hers as well, she led him through the shadows to a broken, ancient ruin of a home. A small glowlamp emitted its feeble light, shining over Ahsoka's still form huddled under a silvery thermblanket.

Padmé went to her knees beside her, and gently moved her shoulder. Anakin knelt to the other side. "Ahsoka?"

Her eyes blinked open. For a moment, she only saw Padmé, and Anakin didn't mistake the expression on her face, not this time. Then she winced. "Hi."

"Hi yourself," Padmé said, and tilted her head to Anakin.

"Hey, Snips. You had us worried." He pressed his hand against her arm, and now, reaching out with the Force, he felt it. "How badly are you hurt?"

Ahsoka made a face. "It's broken." As they moved the blanket aside, the crooked angle of her shinbone drew a harsh gasp from Padmé. "My comlink was busted when I fell. I've spent the last couple of days trying to fix it."

Anakin saw the pieces by her head. He could tell at a glance there wasn't enough left intact to rewire it. If they hadn't come for her, she'd never have made it back to the surface.

"Why are you down here?" he asked, demanding more harshly than he intended.

"I was researching. I heard a rumor there was something down here, something ancient to do with the Jedi. I wanted to see."

"It's evil, whatever it is," he said.

"I figured that out. That's why I really wanted to see. I don't think the Council even knows this is down here. It's Sith."

"We can tell them when we get back to the top level."

Ahsoka stared at him. "You want to leave? We should explore."

"No, we shouldn't." His own curiosity nagged at him. "You could have died. We'll tell Obi-Wan. The Council can send someone. This isn't our job any more."

"But we're the ones here now," she said, with the old conviction shining through even though her voice was edged with pain.

"What is the actual danger?" Padmé asked. "Is it because it's a ruin, or because of the Dark Side?"

"Both," they said together. Anakin saw her quick smile, looking between them.

"I know my way around ruins, and I can't be tempted by the Dark Side. I'll take a look. I'll make some holocam recordings for us to take back. And if I get into any danger, you can come get me."

"This is a terrible plan," Anakin said. "If we have to explore, I'll go."

"Bad idea," Ahsoka said. "If you get injured, Padmé won't be able to pull you out, and right now, neither will I."

"I don't like this," he said, visions of disaster bubbling in his head.

"You don't have to like it," Padmé said, and she pecked a kiss on his cheek. "I won't be gone long. Get Ahsoka ready to travel."

"Keep your comm open."

They watched her go, setting the other comlink to the side where they could hear her in case of trouble. Anakin turned back to Ahsoka. "We should try to set the bone. But it's going to hurt."

"I tried. I know." She sounded weaker now.

"Have you had anything to eat or drink?"

"I went through my supplies. I've been keeping warm. I know how to hold off shock. I know how to do this. I'm not a little kid any longer."

He nodded. He searched through the pack he'd brought, looking for slickplast and something solid he could use as a splint. Nothing came to mind until the natural solution appeared. Ahsoka gave him a lopsided smile as he placed the handle of his lightsaber against her leg.

"Breathe through the pain," he said, and that was the only warning he gave her before twisting her leg back into position. She didn't shout or cry out, only gave a loud groan, but he felt the wave of agony slam into her. He hurried to sealing the lightsaber into place, not looking at her face. As soon as he was done, he helped her lay back again.

Padmé said over the comlink, "What happened?"

"I set her leg. Are you almost done?"

"No, I just got here. Give me some time. The artifacts here are fascinating."

Anakin shared a glance with Ahsoka. Padmé wouldn't be tempted by the Dark Side. Tempted by some old forgotten junk from ten thousand years ago? That was a different story. She could be here for hours.

"You have five minutes," he said over the comlink. "Let's get you ready to move as soon as she gets back." He gathered the few items she had scattered close by and stowed them into his own pack. There was nothing around to use as a crutch, which meant he'd have to carry her or risk her jostling her leg as she tried to hobble along. "Why didn't you come with anyone else?"

"I did. He got spooked and ran off."

"Anyone I know?"

"No, and don't give me that look."

"I'm not giving you any looks."

"Right." She held out her hand. With some concern, he took it and helped her up on her good leg where she stood unsteadily, holding on to him. "I can make it."

"It's better if you don't try. I'll carry you."

"Really, I'll be fine." She let go of his arm, tried to hobble forward, and fell. Anakin caught her easily.

"Now will you let me carry you?"

"Not if I have a choice."

He readied himself for an argument, and then he figured out what her refusal was about. "I understand that you're trying to be self-reliant now, and that the last person you want to have to lean on is your ex-master." He watched her face change, tightening into denial. "But as your best friend, I'm worried about your health, and I want to help you. All right?"

She hesitated a moment longer, then nodded. Anakin loaded the backpack onto his shoulders to even up the load, snapped the comlink to his belt, then picked Ahsoka up.

"How does that feel on your leg?"

"Not great. I'll manage."

He carried her back to the main path. Padmé joined them. "It's incredible in there. I think you're right, it's some sort of Sith temple, thousands of years old. If the Order sends in a team to explore it, I'd love to join the expedition."

A Sith temple buried under Coruscant's sublevels? He was curious enough to want a look for himself. The whispers were back in his ears. But Ahsoka was hurt, and they needed to get back. "We can come back ourselves, but not now."

They made their slow way back towards the access to the higher levels. On a day when he hadn't already walked miles in the dark to find her, Anakin could have carried Ahsoka most of the way back without a problem. Today, he was tiring faster than he liked, and twice he stumbled, jostling her injury.

"I can try to walk, if I can hold on to your arm," she said.

Padmé said, "It's worth a try."

Anakin set her down, feeling the burning in his arms as the muscles relaxed their long grip. They had only made it up one level, slowed by their burden. The transport pod they'd brought waited for them another five levels up at the last entrance it fit through. As Ahsoka took a few steps beside them, he knew their pace would slow even further. They moved on, the darkness oozing away from the light of their glowrods, then seeping back in behind them. Ahsoka had come down here with a friend who had run away, leaving her alone in this massive shadow with voices whispering evil things.

The whispers were almost gone now.

"We should think about making camp," he said. "After we get a little rest, we should be able to make better time back."

"All right," Ahsoka said, and gratefully found a place to sit. Even the little walking she'd done had fatigued her. Her features were pinched and sickly in the low light.

Padmé noticed the same thing, pressing a hand against her cheek. "What's the normal body temperature for your species?"

"A few degrees below a human's. It's fine that I'm chilly."

"You might feel chilly, but you're very warm." She dug into her pack. "Can you take antibact?" Ahsoka nodded, and Padmé passed her a tablet from the medikit. Then she pulled out her own blanket from her pack. Anakin took out his and Ahsoka's from his own pack. Padmé took them and made up a small sleeping place on a flat part of the ground. She sat and helped Ahsoka climb in. "Anakin, you too."

"Me too what?"

"We're getting some rest," Padmé said, wrapping her arms around Ahsoka as she lay down. "You rest on her other side."

Anakin took an involuntary step back. "I don't know if that's a good idea."

"It's an excellent idea," Padmé said. "We should keep her warm. You told me the two of you set up camp before plenty of times."

Ahsoka closed her eyes. "I don't bite." She sounded exhausted, and that was what convinced him. Anakin climbed into the impromptu bedroll to the other side of Ahsoka from where Padmé lay, and with only a small amount of discomfort, he wrapped his arms around her, too.

He wanted to say something meaningless but comforting, like they'd get through this, or that they'd been in far worse scrapes. Instead, as soon as his eyes closed, he fell asleep, and woke sometime later to hear the two women beside him whispering to each other. It was clearly a private conversation, and even this close, he didn't hear all the words. But he heard enough.

Anakin lay there beside them for a while, his mind churning. Part of him, the part of him that had come close to beating Clovis to death over a misunderstanding, surged in anger. But it was muted, not a killing rage, not this time.

Padmé stirred from the other side. "Anakin's awake," she said in a normal voice. Ahsoka jerked in his arms.

"I've been awake," he said. The tension in Ahsoka's frame didn't relax. Either he could pretend, or he could confront them, or he could decide on another path. He wondered how much of his decision had already been made when he'd fallen asleep holding her.

He took a long breath, and said, "How long has this been going on?"

"Nothing's going on," Ahsoka said, and Padmé said, "A while."

He moved his arms, shifted, and sat up, pulling away from them. "One of you just lied to me."

"It's nothing," Ahsoka said, and she looked at Padmé before she dropped her eyes. Her face was drawn in a simple sadness, and embarrassment. "It's really nothing. I swear."

Padmé said, "Feelings aren't nothing, whatever Yoda told you when you were a child. It's not a bad thing to care about someone."

"Caring is fine," Ahsoka said miserably. "But not like this. You're married."

"I know. I wish we could have told you sooner."

Anakin watched them both. "You're in love with Padmé?"

Ahsoka curled herself into a ball. "We can stop talking about this now. There's no point. Let's just get back to the surface, and I'll check into a medcenter, and not bother either of you ever again."

"That's a 'yes,"' he said. "And you never intended to tell her, because you were a Jedi. And then you weren't a Jedi, and the first thing you did was show up at her place, even though you said you suspected the two of us were together."

"You were a Jedi, too," Ahsoka said, not looking at him. "You both would have known a romance couldn't last. I had no idea it was more than that." She sighed. "A lot more."

Padmé said, "You know now. There are no more secrets between us. I promise." She stroked Ahsoka's shoulder. "I wasn't willing to act before. One secret relationship with a Jedi was enough of a headache. Now neither of you are Jedi. That makes everything easier."

And this was the part that hurt. He said, "You're in love with Ahsoka."

Padmé looked at him with mild exasperation and a great deal of affection. "I told you that. I've told you several times how much I love both of you."

"But that's...." His memory caught up with him. Padmé had said that to him on multiple occasions. He'd assumed she meant she loved Ahsoka as a friend. "How is this not a worse headache?"

"Because you love her too. Not exactly the same way I do, but enough. And you and I love each other. It's really very simple if you look at things logically." Padmé's voice had taken on that slightly superior tone she got when she was lecturing him. He did love her, but that particular habit grated on him.

"That's not what 'logically' means!"

Ahsoka said, "She has a point."

"Of course you'd take her side."

"I'm not taking a side," she shot back. "I'm only saying she's not wrong. This isn't as complicated as it was before. She loves you, and you're my best friend. I never wanted to come between you."

"You're literally between us right now."

"Okay, bad choice of words," Ahsoka said with a smile. "But you know what I mean. I don't want to hurt you, Anakin. I love you more than almost anyone I've ever known. I was already spending my life with you. Is it so bad to think about now?"

He watched them both in the low light. Padmé was calm, waiting for him to see her point. Ahsoka was growing hopeful rather than despondent. He moved to his feet. "We should go. We need to get to the surface and get your leg treated."

Padmé gave him another look, but helped him fold their blankets into their pack. They each ate a small rations bar, then Anakin lifted Ahsoka again. Now that he'd rested, she was an easier burden resting in his arms. They made their way to the next level up, and up again. Three hours later, they reached the level with the transport pod. Anakin had half-expected it to be vandalized or stolen, but it waited undamaged as he carefully placed Ahsoka into her seat. Padmé let out a happy sigh as she sat in hers.

"That feels good."

The medcenter was close to the apartment complex. As soon as they came in, Ahsoka was taken off by the medical droids on staff while a human asked Anakin and Padmé questions about her injuries. "Who should we contact in case of further questions?"

"We're her family," Padmé said. "You can keep us informed."

They split their time. Anakin stayed at the medcenter while Padmé returned to the apartment to bathe and change. When she came back, he left to do the same. He hadn't spent much time here alone. This was home, had been the place he thought of as home, but only over the last few weeks had he been given the opportunity to live here. It didn't belong to Padmé, was only a loan from her own government who would provide the same to the next senator, and the next. This apartment was home, but it wasn't forever, only until her term was finished.

Home was the people he shared it with.

He still had Ahsoka's things in his pack. After he dressed, he put everything away, placing her few clothes in the same tiny area of the wardrobe where his hung. Then he returned to the medcenter, and sat with Padmé as they waited.

"The doctors will keep her overnight," the aide said. "Her leg is already healing, but the infection will require more treatment."

"Can we see her?" Padmé asked.

"The patient is in an induced sleep. She will wake tomorrow."

Anakin said, "We'd like to see her anyway."

"Very well." The aide led them back to the treatment room. Her leg was wrapped in a bone regrowth device, and fluids ran from a catalyzer into her arm and out again. Anakin had seen much worse during the war, and still he felt an unhappy clench in his heart. Padmé went to her bedside and kissed her forehead.

"We'll see you soon," she said.

Back at the apartment, Padmé ordered them dinner, then took his hand and led him out on the veranda, as she had the first night he'd come here after he'd left the Order. Ahsoka had been sound asleep in her bed, and now he understood why.

She said, "Do you want to talk?"

"I don't know what there is to say."

"You can say you don't like the idea. You can say you're not comfortable with the thought of Ahsoka living here with us. You can say you want to keep our marriage to just the two of us. You can tell me you're angry, or confused."

He looked out at the city. "I'm not angry. Part of me wants to be angry, but the rest of me is just grateful you're both safe, and most of me wants to see you both happy." He leaned back. "I don't know who we are as a couple. We haven't had the chance to figure that out, and now I'm trying to figure out who I am when I'm not a Jedi, and you want to add a third person to the mix who doesn't know who she is right now, either?" He shook his head. "You say it's simple and logical. I say, it's going to be a mess."

"Oh, it is surely going to be a mess," Padmé said. "For a lot of reasons. You two have more practice living with each other than you and I do. I have responsibilities to my people, and I intend to honor those responsibilities. While you're figuring yourselves out, I know who I am, and I've got work to do. My relationships still have to be secondary to my duty. Do you understand?"

"I think so."

"Good. Let's eat. And after dinner," she said with a slight hesitation, "we should talk more. I spoke with the doctor while I was waiting for you at the center."

* * *

Ahsoka was released from the medcenter after three days. She hadn't been allowed visitors other than Anakin and Padmé while she'd recovered, but as soon as they brought her home, their doorstep was dark with friends. Rex nearly strangled her with a hug, glad to see her okay and outraged on her behalf at what she'd been through. Bail brought a gift of flowers and wishes for a speedy recovery, as well as a formal invitation from his wife for her to visit Alderaan whenever she liked. A dozen other well-wishers dropped by.

Obi-Wan came last of all the people Anakin had expected to see. He wasn't surprised when the door opened, but only because he'd had to authorize entrance.

"Hello," Obi-Wan said first. "You look well."

"Hi. Thanks." He stood there awkwardly, then moved aside to let him in. "How have you been?"

"Fighting a war. You could come back to that, you know. We need you."

"You told me to leave."

"I told you to follow your heart. We could still use your brain and your hands."

"I don't think I belong there. I'm still figuring out where I belong. At the moment, that's right here."

"If you say so." He dropped the subject, and Anakin wondered if it had been his idea at all, or a nudge from the Council. Instead his face filled with warmth as he saw Ahsoka. She stood as he came close, and they hugged. "It's good to see you."

"And you, Master."

"Not something you ever have to call me again. How are you feeling?"

"I'm all right. Did Anakin tell you what we found?"

"I got the message, yes. A Sith temple? Are you sure?"

Anakin said, "I didn't see it. Padmé took holos."

"I saw it," Ahsoka said. "I'm sure. We have to go back and investigate. It might be the reason the Jedi have had trouble with foresight."

"A thousand year old temple? What would activate it now?"

"I guess we'll find out."

"We? Does that mean you're interested in coming along on the expedition?"

Ahsoka said, "Of course. I have to show you where it is, and I want a better look around on two good legs."

Obi-Wan turned to Anakin. "At least one of you is coming back to help."

"Did you come here to say hi or to recruit us?"

"Mostly I came to see how Ahsoka was feeling. Having you both back around was a secondary consideration, though I do miss you. I'm glad you're faring well."

"We are," Ahsoka said. "Can you stay for dinner? Padmé would love to see you, too."

He glanced at Anakin, who said, "And she'd yell at us if we didn't insist."

"In that case, I would hate to disappoint the Senator."

Padmé returned after her evening session, by which point Obi-Wan had extracted a promise from Anakin to consult with the Council upon request, though he stood firm about not rejoining the GAR. "I've never been a civilian before. I like it."

"And it looks very good on you," Padmé said, with a frank grin that made Obi-Wan redden under his beard while Ahsoka laughed.

Obi-Wan covered his discomfort with a cough, turning to Ahsoka. "The next thing you'll tell me is that you're married, too."

"Don't laugh. I could be," she said. "Half the women my age on Shili are already married."

He raised his eyebrows. "I strive to learn something new every day. Today's quota is achieved. Did you know that?" he asked Anakin.

"Are you kidding? If I'd done HoloNet searches on Togruta mating practices when we were back at the Temple, I'd have been brought up on charges, too."

Padmé said, "Another reason I'm glad you're here now." Ahsoka offered up a wider smile as Obi-Wan watched them in amused confusion. Anakin didn't tell him about his recent HoloNet searches after he'd left the Temple. He didn't mention that the best way to relax a Togruta woman was to massage the tips of her lekku. He would never, ever describe the sight of Padmé bending her head to nuzzle and nibble between Ahsoka's legs while he stroked the patterns on her face. There would be time to tell Obi-Wan some of this, in the days and weeks and years ahead of them when they'd decided what they were going to tell.

The four of them chatted long after dinner was finished, Obi-Wan finally bowing out at almost midnight. He asked Ahsoka, "Are you planning on staying here for long term? I'd have thought you would want your own place, no matter how spacious a handmaiden's room is."

"Handmaidens get their own in-room 'fresher," she said. She'd never spent a single night in the room that they called hers, but Obi-Wan didn't have to know that yet, either.

"Lured from a life of solemnity and reflection by a refresher?"

"Among other things. This is home." She hugged him goodbye. Padmé kissed his cheek and wished him well. Anakin locked down the doors and the privacy screens, as had become his evening routine. 

Then, tired from the day and eager with plans for tomorrow, the three of them went into their bedroom and closed the door behind them.


End file.
